Pancit is a filipino noodle dish that has been made for a very long time in my family. When, we have birthday parties or just barbecue's, my grandma would always make her scrumptious pancit noodles. Every time theres a party at my house, I would always lay on my bed, text, go on facebook, and listen to music. But, before my grandmother walks threw the front door. I could smell the scent of my grandmother's steaming hot, just cooked pancit.
When I was a child, I would want to try my grandma's awesome Pancit everytime she came. But, my dad would always say, "mmmm! Yummy pancit! Tastes just like fish!" Then, I would hesitate to eat it and I would miss out on what I could of enjoyed for ages. So, i waited for about 3-4 years to try it and now that I'm 14, it's time I suck it up and go for it! So, when I went over to my grandma's house after school, I got an opportunity to help my grandma make pancit!
I was so excited because I wanted to see what she puts inside it to make it taste delicious! I see her slicing the orange carrots, light green celery and cabbage, pork, shrimp, garlic and onions. Then, I mixed the sizzling pork, shrimp and all the veggies and mixed the noodles when ready. But, while mixing the ingredients together, I couldn't see because off the garlic and onions were burning my eyes! Then, she poured the soy sauce and two of her secret ingredients. She said, "Do not put to much soy sauce or else it will become to salty." My grandma also told me that not a lot of people use the same two ingredients she does.
My grandma always told me stories about her pancit. She said, "When I cook my pancit for my friends, they would always say it was better than restaurant's, or any other food place they've been to." I laughed and said, "I agree with you friends to." I also wondered how long she's making this dish because she is sooo good at making it! :) Well, she did love to cook this dish because she had to. She also told me that she has been making this when she was 16!!
Overall, this experience of me cooking with my grandma has been great! I've got the chance to learn how she makes so much of this delicious, mouth watering dish. I also got the chance to bond and spend quality time with my grandma. Im glad I got to do this because if I didn't go to my grandma's house that day or did the interview. I don't think I would be able to know how to cook the best pancit till this day.
I like how both you and Skylar are doing the same recipe, but you have two completely different essays going on. It's interesting. Anyways, "I see her slicing the orange carrots, light green celery and cabbage, pork, shrimp, garlic and onions. Then, I mixed the sizzling pork, shrimp and all the veggies and mixed the noodles when ready." Was a very good line with descriptive details. I also liked the part about how the garlic and onions were burning your eyes, because that's where your voice really shown through. I was kind of confused though in the beginning how you got from disliking the dish to thinking it's delicious, so you can maybe explain a little more about that. Also, the ending sentence isn's as strong as it could be, so you should end it better because you have a really strong essay. So good luck, and I look forward to seeing the essay.
ReplyDeleteWe should probably try each others pancit, and see if it's similar. I like that you sensory details into this. I like that you put in some memories you had with this dish to.
ReplyDeleteBut fix some spelling errors like "THREW the door" But good job!
Hi Taira,
ReplyDeleteI agree with Eryn's examples of good specific detail. Those, do, indeed, establish your voice and help to put the reader there.
I also agree with her comment about being confused. Does this mean you didn't try your grandma's pancit until you were 14? Did you hesitate just because of your father's words? You seem to be mixing your first taste of pancit with your first time trying to make it...make this part clearer.
As you work on your revision, review each part of the essay and figure out what's important to your focus and what may not be as important. For example, is the part about what you do when you're waiting in your room important to the overall purpose of the essay? Or is it the fact that the aroma of pancit reaches you wherever you are...etc?
mrs s